Saturday, July 31, 2010
I had a weird dream just now. The details have already gone a bit fuzzy in the way that they do, Frances & I were getting ready for some sort of event. And there was this boy around who Frances was flirting pretty heavily with, all with my knowledge and blessing.
His name was Shawn, which is an odd detail to remember.
Anyway, he took things too far. Trying to feel her up, to kiss spots he wasn't welcome to. She gave him a playful warning, and he didn't take the hint. So, i ended up pulling him off of her and fairly violently chucking him out the door and (inexplicably) into the snow.
Now, i know this dream is just somewhat of a hybrid of separate events from Frances' past, and from my own. Not sure what brought it up though. But i can assure you, it's not any sort of 'message' to any blogger friends that Frances might happen to be flirty with. We're cool. :-)
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
I've taken a liking lately to this advice columnist Cary Tennis who writes for Salon. He can be ever so slightly new agey hippie for my taste (which is saying something), but I find his stuff to be generally carefully considered and insightful, tempered by the right amount of wit and snark.
Anyway, I was reading an older column - the advice was nominally to someone asking if it was 'ok' to (casually) sleep with multiple people at once. (His answer, btw, was essentially yes, with some caveats...) Obviously, doesn't quite reflect our situation, but there were some words that struck a chord that I thought I'd share...
We are not so highly evolved that we can navigate the swirling eddies of erotic passion, attachment, dread, fear, loneliness, insecurity, resentment, competitiveness and betrayal without going a little crazy.
True story, Cary Tennis. That about sums things up...
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
f 7/14/10 1:48 pm: grrrrrr! i just discovered i can watch your videos on gidget!!! damn, you tugging on your balls like i asked made me instantly wet. (And yes, this text will make an AWESOME text tue.) ;-)
You said it, baby... :-)
Monday, July 19, 2010
So this morning we finally opened the box of toys that we left at the Best Western back in January. And they TOTALLY unpacked them from the bag they were in to tuck them all neatly into this shoebox.
Yeah, we're not going back there. ;-)
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Monday I finally get to see my frances. By that time, it will be almost two months since I've seen her. Seems impossible. And believe me, it's been impossible. It's not that we haven't tried. The world's kept us both busy, with things that were pleasant and things that were really really not. We've been at the end of our ropes more than once, but we keep managing to climb back up.
It's amazing how much good just knowing we'll see each other seems to be doing us. There's a spark, a playfulness, a lightness in our hearts where it's been too heavy for too long. I've missed it. I've missed her. I can't wait to see her smile and hear her voice and kiss her lips.
And yes, some other places too. ;-)
See you soon, baby.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
So, I tried in my head to write about this last week. But what came to me felt too... raw. Too close to the skin. Too still-not-ok...
I know, I know... All the more reason to write about it, right?
frances and the Man went on vacation last week. Just the two of them. His idea. He didn't tell her where they were going, just that he had it all planned.
She didn't want to go. I certainly didn't want her to either. But things being how they are... we didn't really have much choice. So they went. Things happened. Too many things. And I was hurt, and we fought. But bruised as we are, we managed to find our way back to peace...
d 7/12/10 4:38 pm: ...the trip was ruined from the start. It COULDN'T go well. It was just all wrong. What he wanted and was trying to accomplish was something you wanted no part of. I mean, I KNOW you didn't want to reconnect or rekindle or have this big fucking romantic time with him. But for him, that's what this trip was all about. So trying to participate but not buy into it... there can't help but be all this drama.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Saturday, July 3, 2010